My life in la bodega

In the strangest of matters, I have noticed that everyone I am close to is going through this "break through." Not sure exactly what to call it, but I guess what I mean is trying to figure out what to do next in their life. It's one of those moments (especially when you're my age and especially when you just graduated) when you feel extremely hopeless, too sad and worse of all losing your mind. Mood swings all over, constantly feeling anxious and waiting...just waiting. And while I am here just waiting and constantly on edge, I am learning to hold on to sweet things. Perhaps it's because my cynicism really hasn't been doing me any well, and I'm tired of feeling like this. I'm resorting back to my youthful days (I say that as a 23 year old) when being pure and simple was the best. Back when I lived in New York, and the tiniest thing will make me happy (Do I hear Mister Softee? Mami, Papi I need a dollar, Mister Softee!! Hurry, he's going to leave! I hear the music fading!!) Lately all those little things I loved as a kid are the only things that haven't let me give up.

The good ol' bodega.

For a nickel I can buy a Now and Later, for a dime I can buy Twizzler, or for a quarter I can buy any Wise snack chip (my favorite is Cheez Doodles..crunchy!) Luckily by my job there is a corner store that has my childhood, though there's no merengue-the sugar kind not dancing kind. My childhood as a wanna be BeBes Kids in the hood let to me to experiment with junk food. I would had to say if you wanted to know what taste good together come to me. Like example: this afternoon my lunch consist of Little Debbie snack chocolate roll, Cheez Doodles, and lemon iced tea-all for a price of $1.69! Sounds gross but the taste of sweet and salty...mmm my mouth getting watery right now. I've turned friends into believers. And if you were making the bucks-buying a pizza for a dollar after hitting up the bodega. Seriously that never fails.

Walking around was always good to me. As a kid in my hood-you walked all the time. A lot of those times with your friends (BeBe's kids). My elementary school was about 2 miles away from my house, and every single day with my friends (rarely with an adult) we walked. Sometimes my sister would wait for me and walk me home. Being outside, the breeze, talking. It's nice. Though not too nice in Florida. You see, people here frown upon it. People are always looking at me from their cars wondering why I'm not in a car. Sorry but I'm not going to confine my space-and going out doesn't mean going to another confine space. 

Throwing eggs out the window. Can't do that here for a few reasons. One being that I live in a one story house-throwing eggs is best when living in an apartment. Two you actually need people walking outside, under your window to throw the egg. The last memory I had of the day before I moved from New York was me throwing eggs out the window with a neighbor who was half my age-I was 12. Late that very nite (you see in my hood, during the summer everyone was hanging outside until very late) I heard my neighbor yelling from out her window to her brother who was outside "Yo quiero huevos!" I almost died. 

Books. and more books. Before I got into music (say whaa? there was a time!?) I read so much as kid. I would spend the whole day just reading if I could. It was an escape for me. Being the youngest, and not having any space I found it with a book. Oddly enough-one time my siblings had a party when my parents weren't around and told me not to leave my parents room for the whole nite. I was delighted. A whole night with a book and I can listen to whatever radio station I wanted to hear. 

And I'm pushing over my mid twenties, I realized that those simple things still keep me happy. I need it to stay that way.